Tuesday

SOS Mom Saver: Save Your Sanity Christmas Morning!

A couple of years ago, Sara Groves so perfectly captured the hearts of parents everywhere with her timeless Christmas classic, Toy Packaging. 

I'm convinced the extreme packaging on toys has nothing to do with security.  There are toy execs sitting in a board room on Christmas morning laughing at us as we all attempt to open the maze of screws, twist-ties, tape, rubber bands, random spare pieces of cloth, extra plastic pieces that serve no purpose other than to confuse you and make you wonder why they are there, cellophane,  random pieces of string, and cardboard.  To top it off, they give us 5 pages of instructions on how to open the package alone...in every language BUT English.  No fear, though, they also provide a diagram of the random toy of the day.  You might or might not get a diagram of what you ACTUALLY bought.  There are Chinese children in a sweatshop in Brazil randomly inserting diagrams into toys.  For our convenience.

In order to open said packages and assemble the toys, you will need scissors, a screwdriver, a hammer, a gallon of vodka, a wrench, pliers, a blow torch, welding equipment, a magic lamp with a genie that will give you 3 wishes (I'd recommend making the first one all-encompassing...like 'de-package and assemble all toys' or 'enough money to pay people who are too crazy to know better to open and assemble the toys'...or something similar), and...yeah...I'm pretty much at a loss now.  I'm thinking the magic lamp with a genie and vodka is your best bet.

So how do you prevent the insanity on Christmas morning?  You instead engage in the insanity on another day...as in before you wrap the presents.  If YOU bought the presents, then you know that your kids want the presents, right?  So if you KNOW your kids want the presents and you will keep them...then open them before you wrap them and avoid the insanity that is known as toy packaging on Christmas morning!

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