This archived blog post from November 19, 2005 couldn't be more fitting for right now. This is our "Christmas". The kids will be coming back with my SIL & her family at Christmas, but this is the only time until summer 2009 that my husband & I will see our family.

How proper that this post from "way back when" is still applicable today.

I'm so not ready for this week. Certain people in my family get stressed about seeing people that they have unresolved issues with. This person takes that stress out on the rest of us making our "holiday" miserable as well.

The problem is that the issues with these family members can't be resolved. They don't think they did anything wrong. They don't they they DO anything wrong...ever...in the past or in the future. They just don't ever do anything that might hurt another person. They're those "perfect" people that the rest of us will never measure up to. It doesn't matter how much money you have, how little debt you have, how big your house is, how nice your car is, or how nice your clothes are. You can put on the perfect front in an attempt to get them to like you. It doesn't work. You'll never be good enough.

You'll never get hear the approval that you want so desperately to hear. You never hear that they're proud of you or happy for you. Why is it then that we strive so hard to please people who will always think we're less than them? Why is it that this becomes who we are? We make decisions based on what these people will think of us. Why? Who are they? What does their opinion, thought, or approval matter?

Why can't they see how much their approval matters? Why can't they see how much my best friend just needs to hear that he's loved...without condition...by this person? Why must he always feel he's less than this person? Why must they make him feel this way?

Family. You gotta love em, gotta see em at holidays, gotta go to their funeral...and strive for their approval, acceptance, pride, and love every day inbetween....

-Me